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Anytime Yahoo posts a link to a news story from Reuters or Associated Press or one of the other news agencies, they have a discussion forum where everyone can discuss the story. Needless to say, the dregs of the Internet hang out here and it is a good place to keep tabs on the pulse of the public. Anyway....this fucking post has been appearing over and over on the news posts and I think some whacked out Christian wrote a bot to spam the discussion forums. Posting it here for the sake of posterity and because I think it's really funny:
Have you ever done one or more of the following?
1) Not loved the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, and strength?
2) Held anything as a higher priority than God Himself (e.g. money, sex, status, etc)?
3) Used God’s name in vain, or as a curse-word?
4) Failed to keep the Sabbath Holy (worked, partied, etc; instead of worshipped God on His day)?
5) Dishonored or disrespected your parents in any way?
6) Lied to anyone (even a white lie)?
7) Stolen anything from anyone (even a piece of candy as a child)?
8) Killed/murdered anyone?
9) Committed adultery (lust or sex with one to whom you weren’t married)?
10) Envied someone else (i.e. resentment stemming from desire to have someone else’s possessions)?
If
you answered YES to ANY of the above, the Holy Bible indicates YOU WILL
BE SENTENCED TO HELL, UNLESS YOU REPENT AND ASK JESUS CHRIST TO BE YOUR
LORD & SAVIOR.
Although WE ALL FALL SHORT DUE TO OUR SIN,
the GOOD NEWS is that by GOD’S GRACE -- THROUGH FAITH IN JESUS CHRIST –
we can have our SINS FORGIVEN, ESCAPE HELL, and GO TO HEAVEN TO BE WITH
OUR LOVING FATHER GOD.
Salvation and deliverance are gifts from
God, but it is up to each of us to claim them for ourselves. God will
forgive and deliver us from our sinful life-choices if we ask Him with
a sincere repentant heart in the name of Jesus Christ. The Bible says
that WHOEVER CALLS UPON THE NAME OF THE LORD (JESUS CHRIST) WILL BE
SAVED (Joel 2:32, Acts 2:21, John 3:16) and THERE IS NO WAY TO THE
FATHER EXCEPT THROUGH JESUS CHRIST (John 14:6).
1. Know in your heart that the one true God is the Father of our Messiah Jesus Christ
2.
Accept that Jesus Christ was sinless, He lovingly and sacrificially
shed His own blood on the cross as substitute punishment for your sins,
and that His resurrection on the third day symbolizes every born-again
believer’s new life in Jesus Christ. His ascension represents the
believing Christian’s ultimate ascension into heaven to spend eternity
in the presence of Almighty God.
3. Repent of your sins. Say a
sincere prayer thanking God for sending His son Jesus Christ to shed
His blood for your sins, confess that you are a sinner, concede that
you are truly sorry for your sins, trust in Jesus Christ for
redemption, and receive the Holy Spirit to help you live in obedience
from now on. http://www.stevehill.org/needhelpnow/Howtobecomeachristian.asp
4.
Make Jesus Christ the Lord of your life, putting your trust in Him for
everything - including that He will set you free from sin, deliver you
from addictions & demon possessions, and heal you of all sickness
& disease (AIDS, cancer, depression, etc). See http://www.matthewcmanning.com/about/default.asp
5. Read the Holy Bible every day for wisdom, guidance, strength, and encouragement. If you need to purchase one, see http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/search-handle-url/index%3Dstripbooks%26field-k
eywords%3Dholy%2520bible/002-9498464-5754462
6. Find a local Christian church that you can attend regularly. Make friends and socialize regularly with other Christians. See http://www.churchfinder.com/ChurchLocationSearch.asp
7.
Confess with your mouth to friends & family that Jesus Christ is
your Lord, get baptised, and be filled with the Holy Spirit
8.
Depend on Jesus Christ for everything the rest of your life, and He
will provide for all your needs. And best of all, when this life is
over, He will lovingly welcome you into heaven to be with Him for
eternity.
The choice is yours.
The time is now.
† † †
I have seen this post generate threads hundreds of replies long. I like it. It's kind of the online equivalent of that guy walking around in Central Park wearing a sandwich board sign saying 'Repent now SINNERS! Thy end is NIGH!' I guess those guys figured out how to write spam bots =) =)
Have you ever done one or more of the following?
1) Not loved the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, and strength?
2) Held anything as a higher priority than God Himself (e.g. money, sex, status, etc)?
3) Used God’s name in vain, or as a curse-word?
4) Failed to keep the Sabbath Holy (worked, partied, etc; instead of worshipped God on His day)?
5) Dishonored or disrespected your parents in any way?
6) Lied to anyone (even a white lie)?
7) Stolen anything from anyone (even a piece of candy as a child)?
8) Killed/murdered anyone?
9) Committed adultery (lust or sex with one to whom you weren’t married)?
10) Envied someone else (i.e. resentment stemming from desire to have someone else’s possessions)?
If
you answered YES to ANY of the above, the Holy Bible indicates YOU WILL
BE SENTENCED TO HELL, UNLESS YOU REPENT AND ASK JESUS CHRIST TO BE YOUR
LORD & SAVIOR.
Although WE ALL FALL SHORT DUE TO OUR SIN,
the GOOD NEWS is that by GOD’S GRACE -- THROUGH FAITH IN JESUS CHRIST –
we can have our SINS FORGIVEN, ESCAPE HELL, and GO TO HEAVEN TO BE WITH
OUR LOVING FATHER GOD.
Salvation and deliverance are gifts from
God, but it is up to each of us to claim them for ourselves. God will
forgive and deliver us from our sinful life-choices if we ask Him with
a sincere repentant heart in the name of Jesus Christ. The Bible says
that WHOEVER CALLS UPON THE NAME OF THE LORD (JESUS CHRIST) WILL BE
SAVED (Joel 2:32, Acts 2:21, John 3:16) and THERE IS NO WAY TO THE
FATHER EXCEPT THROUGH JESUS CHRIST (John 14:6).
1. Know in your heart that the one true God is the Father of our Messiah Jesus Christ
2.
Accept that Jesus Christ was sinless, He lovingly and sacrificially
shed His own blood on the cross as substitute punishment for your sins,
and that His resurrection on the third day symbolizes every born-again
believer’s new life in Jesus Christ. His ascension represents the
believing Christian’s ultimate ascension into heaven to spend eternity
in the presence of Almighty God.
3. Repent of your sins. Say a
sincere prayer thanking God for sending His son Jesus Christ to shed
His blood for your sins, confess that you are a sinner, concede that
you are truly sorry for your sins, trust in Jesus Christ for
redemption, and receive the Holy Spirit to help you live in obedience
from now on. http://www.stevehill.org/needhelpnow/Howtobecomeachristian.asp
4.
Make Jesus Christ the Lord of your life, putting your trust in Him for
everything - including that He will set you free from sin, deliver you
from addictions & demon possessions, and heal you of all sickness
& disease (AIDS, cancer, depression, etc). See http://www.matthewcmanning.com/about/default.asp
5. Read the Holy Bible every day for wisdom, guidance, strength, and encouragement. If you need to purchase one, see http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/search-handle-url/index%3Dstripbooks%26field-k
eywords%3Dholy%2520bible/002-9498464-5754462
6. Find a local Christian church that you can attend regularly. Make friends and socialize regularly with other Christians. See http://www.churchfinder.com/ChurchLocationSearch.asp
7.
Confess with your mouth to friends & family that Jesus Christ is
your Lord, get baptised, and be filled with the Holy Spirit
8.
Depend on Jesus Christ for everything the rest of your life, and He
will provide for all your needs. And best of all, when this life is
over, He will lovingly welcome you into heaven to be with Him for
eternity.
The choice is yours.
The time is now.
† † †
I have seen this post generate threads hundreds of replies long. I like it. It's kind of the online equivalent of that guy walking around in Central Park wearing a sandwich board sign saying 'Repent now SINNERS! Thy end is NIGH!' I guess those guys figured out how to write spam bots =) =)
